It's increasingly hard to reply to comments these days. Mostly because you are all so lovely, and you all leave me such encouraging, sweet, love-filled notes. It overwhelms me to a point where sometimes, I just sit and cry and re-read them. And then I cannot respond for a few days. Thank you all so much, and I'm so sorry that it takes me so long to respond to your comments and your notes, and I'm even more apologetic if I don't get to ever responding, either because I'm not sure what to say or because I just don't have the time on hand to do so. Either way, I hope you stick with me...
Ever since the 14th, it's been really hard to live life the same. School, home, my clubs... even dA. I've kind of just let you all down. And I feel terrible for doing so. But it's so hard. Really, truly. It's never ever been this hard to live before. And I'm really sorry. It's honestly gotten so bad that... the thoughts of suicide are more frequent now. They just won't settle down inside me. I'm so sorry. To everyone around me, to my friends and my support, and mostly... I'm sorry to myself. For myself.
It's really hard for me to be actively around people right now. And it might take me awhile to get out of this rut. But for now... I need to keep my distance from everything and everyone. I'm sorry. But, if you ever need me, just know, I'm still here for you. I'm still here. I still love you.
On another note, before I say goodbye, thank you for the 300 watchers. I missed the rollover, and now I'm at 325, but I'm still so happy. Thank you very much. Thank you.
Stay gorgeous and stay safe. You're loved. I love you.
